|Compromising Positions | Into the Black | Contact|
Crime and PunishmentThanks to: Brenda, my wonderful beta, corrupter of the last vestiges of my innocence. Any remaining spelling or grammar mistakes are mine. And to the people that encouraged me to continue the series.
Series: Beautiful Eyes
Sequel to: Fit to be Tied
I can't get it out of my head. Walking into our room at the inn on Chalcedon, after spending the day shopping with Inara and River, walking in and seeing him, them. It's been a week, but the sight of Jayne's back and ass muscles contracting as he comes inside that, that woman haunts me. I can still see myself dropping the bag on the floor and just turning tail and running, trying to get away from what I had just seen. Jayne ran down the hall after me, still nude and grabbed my arm. I couldn't even look at him.
I put steel in my voice: "Let go of me. NOW." Then I jerked my arm away and left him standing there calling my name in bewilderment.
Those were the last words I spoke to him. I've been hiding in the medlab, avoiding the common areas. When we're forced into the same room, I ignore him; refuse to answer to his voice. I ignore the confused look in his eyes and the hurt that's growing there. The others know something is going on, but aren't sure what.
I hear the door to the medlab close and turn to see Jayne closing the blinds.
"We need to talk," he says.
"Damn it, Jayne. Get out of here. Get away from me."
"No, I ain't leavin' till this is settled." He moves towards me, I back away. But I'm too close to the examining table and find myself backed up against it with no way around him. His scent is overwhelming. I feel myself wanting to touch him. I force the desire away with the image of him with that woman.
"Simon, please. Talk to me. Why are you so angry?" He pleads.
I can't believe my ears. "Why am I so ANGRY?!" I shout at him. "You fucking KNOW why I'm so angry. You can't be that stupid."
He looks perplexed. I can almost see the wheels in his brain moving. He rubs his head. "That girl?" He asks, puzzled. "But, it was just a girl, a whore. What's the big deal?"
"What's the big deal? What's the big deal? I can't fucking believe you. You ARE too stupid to live!" I scream at him. I can feel the tears welling in my eyes, but I refuse to let them fall. I will not cry in front of him. "Get out. Now."
He just stands there making soothing motions with his hands. He reaches out a hand to touch my face and I punch him in the jaw. Hard. He's so shocked he doesn't even try to hit me back, he just pulls away.
"You don't get to touch me. Not now, not ever again. For the last time get out." I turn my back to him. As I hear the door open and his footsteps recede down the corridor I pick up the medical tray full of instruments and throw it against the wall beside the door. Metal instruments fly everywhere, narrowly missing the Captain who has just slipped into the lab.
"I thought I told you two not to disrupt the workings of the ship," he says.
"We haven't," I respond.
"You call this not disruptin'?" He asks as he gestures to the mess at his feet. "Not to mention the fact that Jayne's been mopin' around this place ever since we got back from Chalcedon and you've been hiding in here? I'm guessin' something must have happened planet-side."
"What happened is NONE of your business," I growl at him.
"Really, you don't say. Well, Mr. High and Mighty, I hate to tell you this, but everything that happens on this ship and to my crew IS my business. Jayne's worthless to me in the condition he's in now. He's liable to get himself, or me, or Zoe killed, the way he's acting. So you ARE going to fix it, and fix it fast." He turns on his heel and leaves before I can tell him to fuck off.
"Green and blue," she says.
"No, River. No more green and blue."
She comes into the room and kneels beside me. She takes my hand. "You need green and blue. You need him here," she says as she puts my hand on my chest, just over my heart.
"It doesn't matter anymore. It's done," I say. "Now go back to your room and go to sleep."
Amazingly, she does as I ask. Just as she gets to the door of my room she turns, "He needs you too. Don't leave him in the dark place. He's scared."
I lay back and ponder my sister's words. Why does she pick the most inconvenient times to be coherent?
The next day I find myself at Jayne's door. I knock and then enter before he has a chance to call me in. I close and lock the door behind me, then hop quickly down the ladder. His eyes are on me watching my movements. He gets up off his bed slowly and comes towards me.
"Stop. We need to settle this," I say as I cross the room to his dresser. I open a drawer and dig around until I find the two shirts that I want.
"I'm going to make this clear. And I'm only going to tell you once - you are MINE, Jayne Cobb, mine. If you EVER fuck around on me again - women, men, cattle, whatever - I'm going to cut your dick off and feed it to you. Do you understand me?"
"But it was only a whore," he says, still a bit slow on the uptake, "She meant nothing. It was just some fun. I got bored when you were out."
"Next time you get bored, play with yourself," I say harshly as I walk towards him. I look up at him and poke a finger into his chest, hard enough to bruise. "I want you to repeat after me - 'I will never fuck around on you again.'
"I will never fuck around on you again," he parrots.
"Say it like you mean it," I demand. He repeats the phrase with more feeling.
"Now say, 'I love you and the last six days have been agony'."
"I..." he stops. My heart skips a beat. Shit, I've pushed him too far, too fast. But, instead of pulling away, Jayne encircles me in his arms, pulling me close, and then he reaches up and trails a hand along my face as he stares deep into my eyes. "I love you," his voice husky with emotion. "The last six days have been more than agony, they have been the worst days of my life. Don't ever leave me again." He runs his thumb across my lips and then he leans down and kisses me softly. I deepen the kiss, drawing his tongue into my mouth. His hand cups the back of my neck and his fingers entwine in my hair. I grab his ass and pull him into me. He trails kisses along my jaw and down my neck. He sighs my name when I start nibbling his ear.
"Just for the record, I love you too, you big lug," I whisper. I pull back and hand him the t-shirts. "Now tie me down and fuck me like you've never fucked me before."